Don't let pesky prenup cow you

DEAR AMY: My fiance and I are getting married in six months. He comes from an extremely wealthy family, but is considerably wealthy in his own right. We had already begun to make financial plans when his parents insisted that we get a prenuptial agreement. I believe that a prenuptial agreement completely devalues a marriage. My fiance and I decided against it and informed his parents. They then threatened to cut off my fiance's inheritance if we didn't sign a prenup.

I hate that they're controlling us like this. Should I accept that they're going to cut off the inheritance and stick to my principles? Or should I disregard my values and sign the papers?AnxiousDEAR ANXIOUS: I'm not sure how prenups "devalue" marriage, but many couples do find it challenging to basically plan for divorce while they are also planning their "happy-ever-after." However, prenups give couples a rock-solid reason to review assets and financial plans, spending habits and budgeting practices. I highly recommend complete financial disclosure and financial counseling for marrying couples.

This dust-up provides an opportunity for both of you to assert your dominion over your own lives and future.

If your fiance's parents are pulling the purse strings now, you can assume they will resort to the "nuclear option" of disinheritance at other times during your marriage -- unless he demonstrates that his parents can't control him in this way.

I assume your future in-laws are worried that money they would leave to their son might land in the shared marital asset category after their death, but surely they have the ability to plan their estate around this possibility.

You must not sign anything because you feel pressured and you should never sign a document like this without having it reviewed by your own personal lawyer.