Farmingdale adult day care helps community

A year ago, Nina Pesce’s mother had an obstruction in her upper intestine, and following surgery developed a swallowing problem. The doctors wanted to hook her up to a feeding tube.

Instead, she took her mother, Lena Murania, 95, who has dementia, home with her.

“My husband said, ‘You realize you’re taking your mother home to die with dignity.’ And I said, ‘No, I’m taking her home to live,’” said Pesce, 64, of Wantagh. “When I brought her home, I was looking for a center that dealt with people with dementia.”

Once she nursed her back to health, Pesce found the Farmingdale Adult Day Care Center (FADC) a perfect place to leave her mother during the day.

The FADC was founded as an nonprofit interfaith initiative in 1995 and is located in the basement of the United Methodist Church on Main Street. People 60 and above who can no longer function on their own can socialize, eat and play games with people their own age, giving their caregivers a break during the week.

The center’s director, Brandi Fromm, said the atmosphere is meant to mirror the comfort of being in a living room and is the ideal alternative to a nursing home.

“It gives family members a break and people with some type of dementia a purpose to get out of bed in the morning,” said Fromm, 55, of Levittown. “It helps with their cognitive abilities and socialization.”

Program assistant Renee Hartmann said the center also gives caregivers the break they need.

“Farmingdale, being such a working-class community, you have both husband and wife out there trying to pay the bills,” said Hartmann, 43, of Farmingdale. “It’s those six hours that they [caregivers] need to get out and do what they need to do.”

Like Pesce, Maureen Mendolia came to pick up her mother on Monday from the adult day care.

Josephine Atwater, 89, moved in with Mendolia two years ago because of her progressing Alzheimer’s disease, resulting in forgetting to eat right and becoming paranoid of phone calls.

“When you have Alzheimer's or dementia it becomes a repetitive day,” said Mendolia, 55, of Bethpage. “The illness is strange. It robs them of their memories. It robs them of their ability to take care of themselves.”

About two years ago, Atwater had to leave her friends in Florida so she could move in with her daughter’s family.

“It could be a really long day when she doesn’t have people her own age to speak to and I have things to do,” Mendolia said. “I knew I had to recharge my batteries, and I started looking for a day care.”

Atwater used to get upset if they drove by a nursing home, Mendolia said. Now, she brings her mother to the adult day care almost every day to spend time with people her own age, play Bingo and be entertained by the volunteers.

“She’s very happy here. They asked her where she lived and for the first time she gave them my address, which was shocking,” Mendolia said. “I brought her here to socialize and to give me a break. This is my saving grace. This gets you through.”