First friends, then 'quickie' lovers, what's next?

DEAR AMY: After 20 years of a platonic friendship, my male friend and I began an intimate relationship right after my divorce. This has been going on for about six years. Our relationship has mostly consisted of lunchtime "quickies," the occasional date night, but largely a "see you when I see you" friends-with-benefits relationship. This was great while I was raising my now-14-year-old daughter and while he, too, dealt with his parental responsibilities. I called him recently to convey that I wanted to see him more often. I said I wanted to take our relationship to another level. Several weeks later, I texted him to make plans to get together. He responded by text that he thinks it is best that he distances himself from me until he can give me more of a relationship.

Should I move on - or is this worth talking about?Keep It Moving in D.C.

DEAR MOVING: When you contact your friend to have this talk, remember that you had a relationship of six years' duration that was based on a mutual choice, where either one of you could text or call for a quickie.

Now you are changing the game - but you cannot change the guy. He doesn't want the same thing you want.

I agree that it would have been more gentlemanly for him to deliver his response in person, but let me draw you an analogy: Texting is to speaking in person as a "quickie" is to an intimate relationship.

Now you can test your friendship to see if - minus the sex - you two have anything left.

DEAR AMY: "Not LOL" has a stepdaughter who sends text messages all through dinner. When I had a problem with my kids' cell phones, I simply went on the Internet, pulled up my account and disconnected their phones for the appropriate time. There's no longer a problem in my house.

Dad in Charge