Future wife needs to know of your obesity surgery

DEAR AMY: I'm about to be engaged to a wonderful woman I've known for three years. I have been wondering whether I should tell her that I had lap band surgery for my obesity seven years ago, when I was 45. The surgery allowed me to lose 100 pounds. I had a subsequent tummy tuck that I lied to my lady about (to explain the scar). My problem with food was volume eating; the band allows me to eat only small portions that need to be chewed well, and no fluids can be taken until after meals. I've never told anyone, including my family, about this. I'm worried. What if some medical issue comes up down the road, and my wife finds out about my secret? What will I do if she finds out I lied about my surgeries?Perplexed

DEAR PERPLEXED: You won't have to worry about your secret, because you are going to tell your lady the truth now. Then you won't have a secret.

You have not done anything shameful. It is your right to keep this private from other family members, but your future wife should be told about your food addiction and your successful surgeries to deal with it.

Congratulations on maintaining your healthier weight. Your regimen requires constant vigilance and willpower; this will have an impact on your life together.

DEAR AMY: I've often been in the express checkout lane with too many items, while others behind me glare. Frequently, cashiers will see that I have only a few items over the limit and invite me to use the express lane. Some don't just invite me - they demand it, taking my basket and pulling me into the line. What should a person do then?

Irritated

DEAR IRRITATED: You could respond to glares by saying, "Sorry. I know I'm over the limit, but I'm being held in this line against my will."