Her racial curiousity can be insensitive

DEAR AMY: I am always curious about people's cultural and racial background. My 24-year-old daughter is mixed-race (black and Korean). I went to Seoul when she was 2 years old to bring her home from the orphanage. As a result of knowing her racial makeup, I've sorted out what various Asians look like and can distinguish differences between people from China, Japan, Korea, Mongolia, Vietnam and the Philippines. I am outgoing, and when I hear an accent or see someone I think is a combo like my daughter, I usually ask. Am I being rude if I express curiosity about a person's racial background? Some people like the interest, but others seem to resent it. A man in the supermarket yesterday was obviously annoyed. He was from Sudan. Should I just keep my mouth shut? It seems too politically correct to stay quiet.Just Curious

DEAR JUST CURIOUS: You should feel free to express your abundant curiosity, but you should also accept a stranger's right to keep his or her ethnic or racial story private.

Charging up to a person at the supermarket and saying, "Hi - just curious. Are you a combo?" is obnoxious.

So is saying, "I bet I can guess your race! No, really - I'm very good at this!" You need to accept that some people really aren't going to care one way or the other about your motivations for intruding upon them.

This has nothing to do with being politically correct. This has to do with you engaging strangers in a personal conversation they might not feel like having at that moment.

DEAR AMY: "Grateful but Practical" wondered what she should do with her wedding dress (other than store it). I've redone many wedding gowns. I have made some into christening gowns, confirmation dresses - even Christmas tree skirts. Dressmaker

DEAR DRESSMAKER: Thanks for these repurposing ideas.