'Potted Potter's Quidditch' challenge

Daniel Clarkson and

Jefferson Turner

have thrown down

the gauntlet to Long Islanders: Be the first to score a goal during "Potted Potter's" audience-participation Quidditch game on American shores. "They did it in Canada,"Clarkson says. "We haven't had a goal yet in America."

Clarkson and Turner are a British comedy duo who tackle the daunting task of condensing all seven Harry Potter books into one 70-minute, slapstick stage show. That, of course, must include their take on the wizarding world's game of Quidditch, which the audience plays by splitting into good-guy Gryffindor and slimy Slytherin teams and swatting a beach ball toward hoops suspended on either side of the auditorium. "There will be a golden snitch that needs to be caught," Clarkson says. "There will be me with a whistle getting far too excited."

Here are five more things that will happen during the dynamic duo's show, which comes to LIU Tilles Center for the Performing Arts in Brookville Thursday and Friday:

You could become a star. Dress like a Harry Potter character and your chances of being chosen as team seeker during the Quidditch match skyrocket. You'll take the stage with Clarkson and Turner as they improvise, sometimes at your expense. (Another way to be chosen, according to Clarkson: "Pay me a lot of money. Bribe me." He's kidding, of course. We think.)

Two men will play 360 characters. Actually, you'll see Turner play Harry Potter, and Clarkson play the other 359 characters, which include faves such as lovable giant Hagrid; oily Professor Snape, as well as the mainstays, Harry's best friends, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. "You'll see a 6-foot-4 man playing an 11-year-old girl," Clarkson says. "That's serious drama training right there to do that."

Harry Potter will produce a Petronus Charm. Harry's protective, silvery spirit animal is a stag, which he produces by pointing his wand and thinking of a very happy, powerful memory. A Petronus protects the conjurer from black magic. You also may see another wizarding animal: a fire-breathing dragon. "The whole premise of the show is we spent all the money for the show on this dragon. We promise a fire-breathing dragon with googly eyes that flies around the theater," Clarkson says.

You'll glimpse the evil Lord Voldemort's underwear. During a good vs. evil "Magic Off" competition between Harry Potter (the former) and Lord Voldemort (the latter), Voldemort performs vaudeville-style sleight of hand, including a card trick and a rabbit-from-the-hat shtick. Then, he magically pulls his own underwear out of his pants. "Lord Voldemort will show his underwear to the audience every night," Clarkson promises. (We did warn you this is slapstick comedy.)

"Twilight" will be skewered. "We mention 'Twilight' a lot because I hate 'Twilight,' " Clarkson says. "It's a story of a 900-year-old vampire with teenage angst." Never mind that Harry Potter is a fictional wizard with teenage angst. "Potted Potter" also makes references to other pop-culture movies, TV shows and music, including "The Chronicles of Narnia," "Bob the Builder" and music from Run-DMC.