She's irked at roomie's rudeness

DEAR AMY: I am a college student who has found herself with a not-so-great roommate. She is very nice; however, she's self-centered to the point of rudeness. I know she doesn't do things to tick me off; it's really because she doesn't think about how things will affect me -- things like napping all the time so the room is always dim and I can't do my projects in there, or having the TV on while I'm trying to study. She goes through my things and ate all of my favorite candies that my aunt sent me. When she left for the semester early, she had me turn in her final paper and got mad at me because I was having trouble printing it. The problem here really lies with my horrible temper. I have managed to keep it in check for a whole semester, but I don't think I can do it for another. I don't want to have to avoid being in my own room just not to get in a fight with her. How do I avoid conflict while still being able to reclaim at least my half of the room?Angry College Student

DEAR ANGRY: The main issue here is one of boundaries. If you learn to draw them now without unleashing your inner Hulk, you will be able to use these skills for the rest of your life.

Your roommate should never go through your things or eat consumables that have been sent to you. You must say to her, "Please don't go through my things. I was very upset when you ate food that was sent to me. Don't do that again." This isn't fighting. This is simply establishing yourself as someone with a right to private property.

Technology can solve some of your other issues. Your roommate has a right to have the television on -- but you (or she) can wear earbuds to mute the noise.

It might help for you two to draw up a very simple schedule where you both are able to use your room peacefully. If you have continuing problems, your resident adviser should be able to help.