She suspects an acquaintance is cheating

DEAR AMY: I recently saw a friend of my husband's out with another woman. The friend knew I had seen him with this woman and we passed each other without him stopping to acknowledge me or introduce me. I did not say anything to him, either. I know his wife and their kids, but I don't know them well. They are my husband's friends and I don't talk to or see them often. I feel that if I do nothing, I am condoning his affair. If I go out of my way to contact the wife, I'm afraid I will get in big trouble with my husband and his friends for "tattling." What would you do in a case like this?

Stella

DEAR STELLA: You don't say what this man and the other woman were doing when you saw them, but let's imagine you caught them in one of those movie romance montages: laughing, sharing an ice cream cone and stopping to buy flowers at a street-side flower stand.

Then you have to ask yourself what you would want someone to do if she were in your shoes.

I, personally, would want to know - and if you agree, then you should tell.

You merely say, "I don't know you and 'Rob' well but I want you to know that I saw him buying Gerbera daisies and sharing an ice cream cone with a woman yesterday." This wife might say she and her husband are separated.

She may tell you to mind your own business.

And all you have to say is, "I realize this is not my business, and it's hard to tell you, but if my husband was seen with someone else, I would want to know. I'm really sorry." After this statement, your involvement in this saga is over.

If this qualifies as "tattling," then plead guilty as charged and be confident that you've acted on your own conscience - not based on your husband's "guy code."