Son's pal comes from an over-scented home

DEAR AMY: How do I tell friends that their laundry soap and aftershave are making me sick? Our sons are very close (they are 10) and spend a lot of time together. When their son is at our house, I have him sit on towels because the scent in his clothes is so strong it clings to the furniture for days! The last time he was here, I had an asthma attack. When my son plays at their house, he comes home smelling, too! I generally have to wash his clothes and have him shower afterward. Between the potpourri, the laundry soaps/fragranced softeners and all the perfume they wear, their house is hard for me to enter. How do I tackle this tactfully?Suffering

DEAR SUFFERING: Your friends aren't doing anything "wrong" by using scented products, and you shouldn't blame them for it.

The most tactful way to approach this is simply and honestly.

Your chemical sensitivities and health issues are not unheard of. Explain that some of the products they use are triggers that can cause problems for you.

If their son spends a lot of time at your house, he could bring an extra set of clothes to keep at your home (that you would launder) to change into when he visits.

DEAR AMY: "Exhausted" said that after her marriage broke up, she was facing life as a single mom to three kids -- mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted. I thought your reply to her was so compassionate. Her letter (and your answer) brought a tear to my eye. I hope she heeds your advice to take 10 minutes after the kids are in bed to write down the good things that happened that day.Faithful Reader

DEAR READER: I was moved by this letter, partly because I've been there. Counting one's blessings doesn't solve everything -- but it's a start.