Superstorm, snowstorm ... stop it, storms!

If Sandy was a superstorm and Nemo was a double-whammy, what diabolical plans do God and nature have for Long Island next?

If these weather calamities keep slamming us this way, what will it take to cause a stir next year? Locusts?

There was once a time that storms of the century came once a century. How quaint and long ago that now feels! Blame global warming. Blame bad karma. Blame the hot air from too many pundits in Washington. Whoever and whatever we blame, this much has grown impossible to deny now: The weather is behaving in ways that are volatile even for volatile weather.

What was said about the weather in Texas now applies to Long Island. If you don't like it, wait a minute -- it'll change.

Some winters, you hardly need a heavy coat. Other winters, you need an industrial-size snowplow. This one came in strong, got wimpy and then got tough all over again. What's the pattern here?

Maybe there isn't one, and that is new itself. "Say it ain't snow," people pleaded at the start of another crazy-weather week.

Well, it was snow all right and lots of it.

We'll get through this. Of course we will. We always do. It's just that hassles keep getting larger. The suffering gets deeper. And now the disasters are colliding into each other and themselves.

You have plans for the storm of the century next week?

1. Salesman with one generator left in stock

2. Big-hearted snow-blowing neighbor

3. Door-to-door shovel kid

4. Fearless food-delivery pro on a mountain bike

5. The sun

Email ellis@henican.com
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